The Ultimate Selfie

The human race has done plenty of stupid things in the past that, at the time, seemed perfectly reasonable. Drinking radioactive compounds for some sort of vague health benefits? Certainly! Putting lead into, like, everything? No problem! Removing large quantities of your blood to, you know, banish evil, or something? Excellent idea!

This, of course, begs the question ‘how are we fucking up today’? What do we have wrong? Are beets actually poisonous? Have you smelled them cooking? I bet they are. Is sustained flight actually possible? Maybe all those airplanes and whatnot just got lucky with the wind. Or maybe it was all an optical illusion. That’s how David Copperfield flew. Seriously, go read the book. It’s in there. Do pants actually cause cancer? I don’t know either way, but better safe than sorry, I say. Seriously, I said that. If you ever use that phrase you owe me a dollar.

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